Zebra Donkey is another episode based on life experience.
In seventh grade, the most popular class was Life Science. The room was full of cool animals like snakes, lizards, hamsters and guinea pigs, but the most popular by far was the tarantula. Guys would put it on their biceps - pose for yearbook pictures with it. Girls would let it nest in their hair, or try to find its spider lips and kiss it.
Because there was only one spider and several hundred seventh graders, love time with the tarantula was in very short supply - so it was rationed out by the teacher - bestowed as a high honor upon the highest quiz score recipients.
This made most kids study like crazy. But for me, hating spiders, it had just the opposite effect.
Life Science was my favorite class - but I made sure to get at least one wrong answer on every quiz so I wouldn't have to hold the hairy monster.
At the end of the year party I thought I was in the clear. But the teacher, an equitable and just woman, had been keeping track of the spider love time, and noticed I hadn't had any. To my horror she made a big deal in front of the whole class about righting this injustice, and before I knew it, the beast was on top of my hand.
It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. And to be honest, I kind of enjoyed basking in the reflected glow of the spider's celebrety.
But then disaster. Right then and there- in front of the whole class, the spider did something it had never done before - it bit. It must have known I secretly hated it, and out of pure malace it gave me a chomp. It hurt like ten bee stings all in the same spot. I flinched. The spider fell.
Later that day word went out the the student body that the tarantula had passed away. The campus mourned.
Needles to say, the last four hours of the school day represent an all time low for my popularity.
People refused to acknowledge that I had been bit, and eventually the story was twisted to the point of me spiking the thing like a football.
Lucky for me summer is long, and kids forget. I replaced the spider, and to this day I go well out of my way to be nice to spiders - because - even though I've forgotten most of what I learned in that class, one thing stuck with me. Spiders have thousands of childern - and one day, one of them may come looking for revenge.
In seventh grade, the most popular class was Life Science. The room was full of cool animals like snakes, lizards, hamsters and guinea pigs, but the most popular by far was the tarantula. Guys would put it on their biceps - pose for yearbook pictures with it. Girls would let it nest in their hair, or try to find its spider lips and kiss it.
Because there was only one spider and several hundred seventh graders, love time with the tarantula was in very short supply - so it was rationed out by the teacher - bestowed as a high honor upon the highest quiz score recipients.
This made most kids study like crazy. But for me, hating spiders, it had just the opposite effect.
Life Science was my favorite class - but I made sure to get at least one wrong answer on every quiz so I wouldn't have to hold the hairy monster.
At the end of the year party I thought I was in the clear. But the teacher, an equitable and just woman, had been keeping track of the spider love time, and noticed I hadn't had any. To my horror she made a big deal in front of the whole class about righting this injustice, and before I knew it, the beast was on top of my hand.
It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. And to be honest, I kind of enjoyed basking in the reflected glow of the spider's celebrety.
But then disaster. Right then and there- in front of the whole class, the spider did something it had never done before - it bit. It must have known I secretly hated it, and out of pure malace it gave me a chomp. It hurt like ten bee stings all in the same spot. I flinched. The spider fell.
Later that day word went out the the student body that the tarantula had passed away. The campus mourned.
Needles to say, the last four hours of the school day represent an all time low for my popularity.
People refused to acknowledge that I had been bit, and eventually the story was twisted to the point of me spiking the thing like a football.
Lucky for me summer is long, and kids forget. I replaced the spider, and to this day I go well out of my way to be nice to spiders - because - even though I've forgotten most of what I learned in that class, one thing stuck with me. Spiders have thousands of childern - and one day, one of them may come looking for revenge.
6 comments:
Great boards dude, and that spider story is hilarious!! Theres no way I'd touch it either, small ones I can handle but GIANT ones are a big no no!!
Ha ha, that story is funny as dude!! Luckily for us we don't have giant spiders in NZ!!
Awesome boards too!!! Some of them don't open for me though!!
hey dave i saw you at the ratatouille sneek peek, whats up? thanks for these posts, the boards are great but you guys are looking for new artists too, who'd you loose?
That's a really great childhood story. Glad you where able to use it!
Hey Davey T,
Dag-nabbit, I've been looking all over for you ever since I started seeing your name on Fairly Oddparents!
Damn, so you were never recognized by the estate of Dave Thomas, huh? Even after his death? Such a crime!
yer pal,
Jesse 'no scat' Wallace
ps. I put the severed finger in the chili.
Hey Guys,
I updated the files, so (hopefully) they will work!
Mukpucky - we are going to have a Tigre panel Sunday at the Comic Con, in a 1000 seat room. Hope to see you there!
Katzenjammer - Wasn't Ratatoullie amazing? Best film of the year, by far! Next time come on over and say "hi!"
As for the help wanted signs at Nick, we promoted a few of the amazing people on our crew - to reward their hard work and huge contributions. Katie Rice, Fred Osmond and Gabe Swarr are all moving up - so we're looking for a few people to fill their giant shoes. No easy task!
Jesse - been a long time pal!
Good to hear from you.
Drop me a line and let me know what you're up to:
dave.thomas@nick.com
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